I don't really want to sound like a lazy git in this one, but I feel something needs to be said and done about this one.

Personally, I don't drink Tea, or Coffee, or most hot drinks for that matter. Yet I am constantly fronted with making these fucking drinks for other people, I can understand that it can be considered a gesture of kindness, But I find that is only applicable for those appropriate situations.

It does my head in making it, people say that it is relaxing and tastes nice to drink, regardless of the amount of stress and effort that you put into making it. Usually you have to fill the kettle back up (usually because there isn't enough water for the amount of tea/coffee required, which can be quite awkward when there is aload of shit in the sink already. Then the laborious task of waiting for the fucking water to boil, you are left staring at the kettle like an invilid, constantly anticipating what by now would of seemed like an almost mythical event of the water boiling.

Now, I don't know really how to make Coffee, there are way to many variations depending on someones taste And every time you are faced with another one. So you're in the Kitchen and you put what you believe is an acceptable amount of Coffee granules into the cup/mug then you get a call in:

"Could you make mine medium strong?!"

Which is usually shouted at you, because you are presumably considered an extremely long distance away from civilisation. So again, you are stood there, scratching your head, thinking to yourself 'well how the fuck do I make a medium strong Coffee!?'. Is it to do with the amount of milk you use? The amount of Coffee?

It's a fucking mystery to me! The same thing is applicable with Tea, when they say they want "strong" Tea. Can't you just be happy with an average cup of Tea/Coffee? Clearly not.

You may be thinking by now, it's a simple task, why are you complaining about it?

I'm complaining because there are so many variables that are needless, like with sugar. When asked if they want sugar, a normal response would be, yes. Not in my house, people will say something stupid like 'sweet please', again, you are stumped at the concept of what 'sweet' could be. Or the worst one imaginable 'make me a nice cuppa tea'. What the fuck, it's like suggesting that your last one you made was a pile of shit, if that were the case, make it yourself with your taste in mind. I mean cut me some slack, exagerate your tastes a little bit more! I am not fucking clairovoyant!

The worst possible situation for making one of these drinks is when you make it for one person, then when you have bought them their drink, you are confronted with another person, a stranger to your home. Then the inevitable question is asked:

"Well aren't you going to make one for our guest?"

And thus the whole process is repeated. Way too much effort goes into these drinks, with me, it is just a case of pouring the drink I desire, then proceed to drink it with minimal effort require. Simple. As you can tell I have a moral obligation to making this bloody drink, if the person wanting it can't be bothered to make it, what the fuck makes them think anyone else is?! I mean, if you know how you want your fuckin' tea to taste, why don't you do it yourself? that way nothing can go wrong with it, or maybe it's because it is just a sick attempt to point the finger at your failure or some shit like that.

It's just like if you don't smoke and people know you don't smoke, yet they still ask you for a fucking cigerette, it's uncouth! I mean they don't expect you to put yourself out to provide them with a fag, so why should it be the same for Tea/Coffee? Why?